Smokestack

I was broken, like a pony,

My wildness tamed before it had a chance

To dance naked in the sprinkler.

Behave! What will people think?

Don't embarrass the family.

They'll arrest you and let your white friends go.

Don't be a pendejo. Cuidado!

War raged in Asia.

My uncle and cousin fought in Viet Nam

My cousin came home

In a body bag.

Communists were taking over the world.

I had my duty to keep America safe

From Communists.

Why didn't they teach us communism in school?

They taught us the weaknesses and

Strengths of our opponent's football teams.

My wildness perked its head out of my parent's corral

When I joined the Navy.

I was proud to serve my country.

Until, until, until,

Body parts flying, bombs blasting, and guns killing,

Twisted my hidden wildness so tight

It shattered.

It spewed in screams

All over the deck,

All around the ship's center smokestack.

Every evening, we pulled away from the task of killing

To replenish our depleting supply of death,

Of screeching, piercing, 75 pound bombs.

When the ship's belly was full,

I exploded in a full run to nowhere,

Around and around the smokestack,

Screaming my sanity back.

Screaming out my horror,

Frantically wanting to scream

The broken, bloody bodies back to life.

Desperately wanting to scream

My own body back

Home to sanity.

She stood on the shore

In her shimmering green ao dai

And pointed straw hat, holding out her hand.

Come back, 1972 is only a memory.

Come with me into the ocean, into the jungle

Of your mild, wildness.

I stared at the shore as I fell on my knees.

Exhausted, I leaned against the smoke stack,

Catching my breath,

Inhaling diesel and death,

Mixed with salt air.

“Did you see that guy

Screaming around the smokestack?

He's wild and crazy!” the new ensign yelled,

Pointing his own shaking finger at me.

The lieutenant shook his head,

“He's the only sane person

On this ship.”

Viet Nam Sunrise Visitation

That is our bed, see the keys?

He places two sets,

One by each pillow on his orange fitted sheet.

And then points to the door.

I walk down the hall,

Down a few steps,

And step back up as the water rushes in,

Up to my ankles.

Alarms are blasting from the ship's speakers!

I run to the repair locker.

It's locked!

I reach into my pocket for the keys,

But only feel the smoothness of my own skin.

A hand grabs my shoulder in the dark.

An Irish Mist voice whispers,

"Don'tcha fall on the slippery deck.

The sea fairies be waving to us, See?"

I look over the side;

They laugh and giggle,

As they glide and slide on the ship's wake,

Glowing their phosphorescent greenish blues.

I jump when octopus wraps

His tentacles around my stomach.

He turns me and she is there,

Wearing only her pointed straw hat.

Her nipples are dark on her small breast.

She takes my hand and leads me into the water. The blue damsel fish are all around us,

Sliding against our flesh.

Ship's alarm whispers in the distance.

She pulls me close and places her soft lips onto mine.

The blue damsels shimmer in my eyes.

The alarm buzzes. The damsels evaporate.

The sun shines on my face.

She rolls over, kisses my lips.

"Good morning, Sweetheart

What do you want for breakfast?"